Tuesday, September 26, 2006
Maybe the Moon is Quieter
I'm a bit introspective these days, partly as defense and partly as healing.
The ususal after-church brunch group took John's ashes to Sophia's (our lunch spot) on Sunday. We ended up being about 20 in number and let John pay for it. Then we took the urn to the cemetery and had a final ceremony there.
We are in the process of interviewing for our new executive director. I hope that it will be someone who is very fun to work with and who gets a lot done. I am interviewing for a resident assistant and need a second one as backup. My assistant also gave notice (mostly because I need the job to be an office administrator and she enjoys doing direct service more...I offered her the resident assistant job, but she can't work the evenings....hmmm, there's the discrepancy), so I'm searching for help there, too.
I've had more clients than I can comfortably see right now with all of the personal time crunch. I currently have 5 clients, each that I'm seeing weekly, or--more accurately--every other week. Today's session was pretty draining as it involved regression to a time when a 4-yr. old was sexually abused by a parent.
I've been seeing a guy for a couple of weeks who seems to be exactly right for me. In fact, I think I am perfect for him, too. At the very least, we mutually swept each other off our feet.
Now he needs space. The better part of me thinks he is right, that if we go slower, we will both trust the relationship to last.
The other part of me thinks, "Oh I recognize this part. It's the part where the relationship dwindles and I go on my way alone again."
I am trying to have the patience to wait. You know, the ol' If-you-love-something-set-it-free kind of thing. Which generally sucks. But since I actually do trust this relationship, I am willing to wait. How long, I don't know. It's only been one day.