Tuesday, December 18, 2007


This came from Eric in response to Bass Ackwards, and I didn't want it to get buried in the comments.

"When I was in ministry I was really supportive of a book called "I Kissed Dating Goodbye." It was a really good book in a lot of ways, though I think it's a bit totalitarian and redcuctionist in its thinking. But it had a lot of good points.

"But I have to say, I have had several friends from Africa and the Middle East who were in arranged marriages, and they all said the same thing: American's have it all wrong. Love is a decision, not a feeling, and the feeling always comes if you make the decision first to really love and honor the other person. I have to wonder how much of what we call "love" is really a product of our social indoctrination and filters."

That reminds me of the anonymous comment someone posted to this blog back in October. The person said that his/her marriage was arranged, that love and adoration came second.

Perhaps our dating services should evolve into marriage services.

1 comment:

Eric said...

I think they exist. I get emails all the time from people like Helga and Anastasia who are really gorgeous Russian women who "saw my profile" and want to get to know me. I've never clicked on any of those links, but I'm sure it's not some type of virus or spyware...


I once saw a cartoon in which all SPAM emails came true, and all the women had these gigantic breasts, the men were all staring down into their pants admiring their new, improved manhood, and there was a whole harem of Russian and Asian wives-to-be waiting on one side. It was pretty clever.

I sometimes wonder if arranged marriages might become some kind of pendulum-swing fad or social phenomenon here. Or maybe polygamy. We take what we have for granted, but in huge parts of the world our system or romance and love is not at all the norm. As America becomes multicultural I wonder how things will change.

That's assuming America will still be around by then.