I Could Learn Alot From My Clients

One of my hypnotherapy clients recently said,

"It's the job of the mind to think.
That doesn't mean I have to believe it."

After Walking the Road

I wonder if I wasn’t intended for another country. I’m a man of imagination and projection. People see in me their dreams, their hopes, their fears. Their imagination. Of course we are all mere projections of others. That’s true.

And others are projections of ourselves.

That’s true, too. So I see all of the same things in other people.

When I left Boston, about 30 of my closest friends (yeah, I had that many then) gathered to cheer me on to New Mexico. Each recounted experiences that we’d shared. Of most interest to me was the comment of Kristen: I have felt that my experiences with you were entirely unique. And they were. Yet I’m learning tonight that all of these other people have been made to feel special by you, too.

I do connect directly with people. That is an experience of the moment. So why do I feel so lost in the moment of now?

This is not the ‘now’ for which I had contended. It is far darker and bleak and without apparent direction than I’d assumed I would encounter.

It’s all easier to take when taken with what I call ‘vacation mind.’ You know how the morning feels different when you are on vacation than it does when you awake having to go to work? That is what I mean.

During my best of days I can employ that frame of thinking. I notice how people drive on the right side of the road, what their license plates look like and what cars look like. I take time to read signs and appreciate how businesses are presented. I watch people’s expressions (I can’t understand their words…I’m a visitor) and I enjoy the emotions around me. I move as a foreign man in a foreign land.

That’s when I think that perhaps it was never intended for me to stay so long in my home country. I walked it, mile by mile, and nothing much surprises me anymore. I truly love it; but I rarely feel engaged these days.

I took a homeless man to his remote land (he owns some in CO, but no means by which to pay the taxes) not so long ago. He asked me to offer a prayer of parting at the end of our excursion. Most of what I said is included in the phrase: May we always be reminded that the adventure lies within, not without.

Some days these days I dream of a remote monastery hermit’s hovel at the end of the Mt. Athos peninsula. There I was greeted in the light of the setting sun by a man showering off the day’s sweat and work under cool water schlepped from the Aegean sea. They told me there that I surely must be Greek. I didn’t, at least, seem American.

I don’t seem to be much of anything of which I’m currently a part. I feel more an amalgam of many things, many experiences, many memories and futures of which I have difficulty speaking. I do feel a part of ‘vacation mind.’

At my best, I feel that, here, tonight, house-sitting for those who have vacated to visit the shores of Alaska, that I am best when not mired too much in the norms of the mainstream.

Perhaps best for me is to be a part of a reclusive hermitage or to be lost in the dense lights of a foreign city.

Co-incidents

Interesting things have begun to happen since I have placed a rainbow sticker on my car.

Oil was poured onto the windshield.

My car was held at the mechanics' garage for a week before they finally told me they couldn't fix it because they didn't have the parts. When I called a couple of weeks later to see if the parts were in, they said that they had ordered the parts but returned them because I hadn't come in. Somehow they had failed to call me to tell me when the parts were in.

When I returned from Phoenix to the long-distance parking lot at the airport, I discovered that someone had let the air out of one of my tires. They had politely left the valve cap for me to put back on once I had re-inflated the tire.

Last night, I found the driver's side door lock missing after going to a movie.

I hope to not be able to report anymore curious coincidences.

Solstice/Birthday Party Pics

Some pics from my birthday party. One gift came as a direct result of this blog...I now have a Swiss Army "Tinker" pocket knife again. Yay!

That's me in the middle. The baby is a doll, not a real, passed out smallish child.



Camera staring, as well as guitar playing and petting guitar players, was popular.



Finger painting--and pointing--was equally popular...



So was throwing clay pots. No actual pots were hurt in the activity.

A Bird in Hand is Worth...

...saving. I found this lesser golden finch lying on my porch being attacked by a colony of ants. S/he fell right asleep once in a borrowed nest, refusing even my offering of ground up seeds.

S/he was very perky in the morning, so I took the bird to our bird rescue sanctuary. Upon walking into the rescue building, I was greeted by one of my employees (whom I didn't know volunteered there). She reported at a staff meeting later in the day that the bird was doing great and would live a happy life.

Happy Solstice!

Decided to throw a party today (belated birthday), since it's the solstice and we'll have more time together. Wait. Is that how it works?

Anyway, we're going to have an open mic for poetry and music (and I might eat fire since I haven't for awhile), an open pool, grilling, pottery throwing, horseshoes, finger painting, a pinata (I can't get this to do the little squiggly thing above the 'n') and lots of good plain fun.

It's threatening to rain an afternoon shower, but I think we'll survive.

I once thought that I’d find a relationship simultaneous to falling in love, that I’d discover the person with whom I’d live out my life at the same time as when we both fell in love. I’m sadder but wiser now.

If statistics tell us anything, there are about 5,000 gay people in Albuquerque. Take out the women and I have about 2,000 guys to meet. Of them, many are taken, many are in their youth and many are old.

Of those remaining, how many have a spiritual depth, enjoy the outdoors, are intelligent, are spontaneous in a healthy way, find simplistic living appealing and, with all of these factors, are attracted to me and I to him?

I don’t deceive myself that I may easily find a life partner.

Instead, I suppose that I should focus on my body, making it appealing so that at least I can have the occasional someone with whom to curl up next to and fall asleep as I grow old. That's what I suppose.

More Words & Phrases

Adding to our list of ongoing phrases that annoy and words that are incorrect or incorrectly used:

"Entitlted" instead of "titled"

"Irregardless" instead of "regardless"

Formerly listed: Click Here and Here and Here and Here and Especially Here.

Whew. If we could delete them all from the listings in the dictionary on my shelf, I'd probably have room for more books.

Nice Day!

Awoke to a birthday greeting text. Got quite a few calls from long-time friends, a couple of Facebook posts from surprising quarters of the earth.

Spent the morning with a 2-hour massage in my house. Massage was from a friend at a birthday gift price of only $40!! Then we went swimming.

Afterwards, I went to spend my birthday money at Mama's Minerals, a fav hangout of mine. You'd be surprised how long I can spend time there. And this time I had money to spend! Yay!

Spent rest of afternoon buying things for a party that I'm throwing this Saturday in celebration of my birthday. Evening was spent beginning to polish rocks with my newly purchased tumbler and preparing gifts to give to people at the party.

Nice birthday!

"There's nothing redeeming about that movie," said a friend. He was referring to "Requiem for a Dream," a film that looks at addiction from multiple sides.

He was right. But it's a great film. (Soundtrack and link to film in column at right.)

Socks, Black Combs and Pocket Knives

I used to lose black combs nearly every week when I was a kid. A comb would slip out of my pocket, or I'd leave it somewhere, and when I went to preen I'd discover that, once again, my comb was gone.

Then I learned to do laundry on my own and was initiated into the adult world where everyone experiences finding one sock missing at the end of doing laundry.

Eventually (although the sock thing continues), as I became an outdoors aficionado, pocket knives (the Swiss Army "Tinker", to be exact) became the item for losing.

I recently replaced one I'd lost and have been determined not to lose it. I've kept it in pockets without holes, have been careful when sitting to do so in a manner that things won't fall out and have diligently placed it on a shelf in my bathroom at night. I haven't lost this knife.

Then, last Tuesday, I had to fly to Phoenix for a conference. Upon emptying my pockets at the security check-point, I was--not surprisingly--asked to surrender my knife...which I had kept securely in my pocket out of recent habit! Once again, I will be purchasing a new pocket knife.

I encourage you to buy Swiss Army stock.

"Something Witty"

Wanted to post something witty, so there it is.

Headed to Phoenix later today for a national conference on Health Care for the Homeless. Will stay with Jeff, my godson Atticus's dad, so that will be fun. Hope to post from there if I haven't melted away into a smallish grease spot.

Got Sound?

Now you can listen to "What I'm Listening To" by clicking on the play buttons to the right. You don't have to purchase or download the MP3, unless you want to. But you can still hear a sample of the music I'm currently into.

Weekend

Played in the Valles Caldera on Friday, followed by an unsuccessful hunt for obsidian. Picture to left is of the caldera, where Asa and I took a 3-hour guided tour to learn this history and see this huge preserve.

Afterwards, attended the opening show of the Nat'l Flamenco Week.


Then hung out until 2 AM at the Albuquerque Press Club. This is a cool members club that feels a bit like a college fraternity (since it's both women and men, is is a mat/frat/erntity??). I might join and make it one of my hangouts.


Saturday I helped a friend landscape some of his yard, though I got distracted at a mineral shop for awhile. Then went to housesit and watch "Brokeback Mountain" as a way to visualize the massive sheep herding that was once a part of the Valles Caldera I'd visited on Friday.

Sunday was a church morning (going with a friend and her three kids), house cleaning and visiting with my landlords sort of day.

?

Since one can say, "Morning is the best part of my day," can one also say that "Morning is the best part of my night"?

Weekend Update

Saturday, 9-1:30 battled bed bugs at shelter with 10 other wonderful volunteers.
Saturday, 3-5 music rehearsal of Krishna Das music for upcoming church service.
Saturday, 6-11 dinner with friends, enjoying music, laughter, stir-fry and company.

Sunday 9-11 breakfast at local cafe.
Sunday 11-2 rock, gem and mineral shopping.
Sunday 2-5 moved back from housesitting.

Dip in pool and enjoying some dinner, then to bed.